so i was in the toilet showering, and then so many thoughts were flowing through my head.

i so wanted to blast the hell out of you, vent all my anger and frustrations and sadness in an entry. about the the fairness in question here, about the things you said, about those untrue things that you said.

but what the hell. would there be a point in doing that? obviously not. i've grown up and taking things in my stride should be the right thing to do.

let bygones be bygones. so cliche, yet so true.

well i guess some people just don't know me well enough. to know that friendship isn't something i would willingly sacrifice or forget about for other things. to know that i always try to stay true to who i am, and that i haven't changed drastically from who i was last time. to know that i always try to make an effort, though i fail sometimes, to make things around me better.

aye its just so sad. and i haven't felt this sad for a long time now. this is even more heart wrenching than being rejected by someone. trust me, it is.

why is it so hard to maintain a balance? be it studies, relationships, friendships. whatever. somehow some other party inevitably gets affected, and i myself get affected as well. why do people always have wrong perceptions of other people? why can't we live in a world of perfect competition (economics.), where there is full knowledge about every single piece of living and non living shit? sigh. why the hell am i trying to crack a joke when i'm feeling so emotional.

maybe its a sign. being angsty and pissed off isn't oliver-ish. its times like this when you feel like you're REALLY becoming someone else. aye.

and i still wish that my life could still be more god orientated. somehow, i'm still losing it. but still hanging in there. and so i shall continue to hang on.

if you remember, my msn nick for one period of time was, "maintaining a perfect balance." useless random nick? nah. so much more to it.

and theres so much more to me than you guys know. (:

i hope this emotion ends tonight. and i hope you never see this post. goodbye.

Labels: peacewithinourhearts.

so i was in the toilet showering, and then so many thoughts were flowing through my head.

i so wanted to blast the hell out of you, vent all my anger and frustrations and sadness in an entry. about the the fairness in question here, about the things you said, about those untrue things that you said.

but what the hell. would there be a point in doing that? obviously not. i've grown up and taking things in my stride should be the right thing to do.

let bygones be bygones. so cliche, yet so true.

well i guess some people just don't know me well enough. to know that friendship isn't something i would willingly sacrifice or forget about for other things. to know that i always try to stay true to who i am, and that i haven't changed drastically from who i was last time. to know that i always try to make an effort, though i fail sometimes, to make things around me better.

aye its just so sad. and i haven't felt this sad for a long time now. this is even more heart wrenching than being rejected by someone. trust me, it is.

why is it so hard to maintain a balance? be it studies, relationships, friendships. whatever. somehow some other party inevitably gets affected, and i myself get affected as well. why do people always have wrong perceptions of other people? why can't we live in a world of perfect competition (economics.), where there is full knowledge about every single piece of living and non living shit? sigh. why the hell am i trying to crack a joke when i'm feeling so emotional.

maybe its a sign. being angsty and pissed off isn't oliver-ish. its times like this when you feel like you're REALLY becoming someone else. aye.

and i still wish that my life could still be more god orientated. somehow, i'm still losing it. but still hanging in there. and so i shall continue to hang on.

if you remember, my msn nick for one period of time was, "maintaining a perfect balance." useless random nick? nah. so much more to it.

and theres so much more to me than you guys know. (:

i hope this emotion ends tonight. and i hope you never see this post. goodbye.

Labels: peacewithinourhearts.